Dating a Non-Christian

In contrast to staying in love, falling in love tends to be something outside our control. Devoted Christians can therefore find themselves in love with non-Christians. Some, unaware that Scripture addresses this matter, have even deliberately exposed themselves to this in the hope of winning someone to the Lord. If ever the saying “ The path to hell is paved with good intentions “ were true, it applies to this tragedy.

1Corinthians 15:33
Do not be misled: “ Bad company corrupts good character. ”

No matter how strong you are, choose the wrong friend, and you’ll be corrupted. Not everyone believes that. That’s why Scripture prefaces this warning with the words, Do not be misled, or, ‘deceived’.

A careful look at the context reveals that “ bad company “ is not necessarily people we would normally think of as being “ bad, “ but people whose belief about Jesus is faulty, even though they might claim to be Christian and live moral lives.

Proverbs 12:26
A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Proverbs 13:20
He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.

Proverbs 14:7
Stay away from a foolish man, for you will not find knowledge on his lips.

Proverbs 20:19
A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much.

Proverbs 22:24
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered,

Proverbs 24:21
Fear the LORD and the king, my son, and do not join with the rebellious,

Psalms 1:1
Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.

1Corinthians 5:11
But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat.

2Corinthians 6:14
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

A prime example is Solomon. Not even all his wisdom could keep him from ruining his life because he chose to befriend women who, though religious, believed the wrong things about God but most of all believed in false gods.

1Kings 11:1-6
King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women besides Pharaoh’s daughter — Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians and Hittites. They were from nations about which the LORD had told the Israelites, “ You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods. ” Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love. He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray. As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his father had been. He followed Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and Molech the detestable god of the Ammonites. So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the LORD; he did not follow the LORD completely, as David his father had done.

Nehemiah 13:26
Was it not because of marriages like these that Solomon king of Israel sinned? Among the many nations there was no king like him. He was loved by his God, and God made him king over all Israel, but even he was led into sin by foreign women.

Since the Bible insists you have little chance if you chose ungodly people as close friends, you must choose between God and wrong friendships. You will not have both for long. When choosing close friends, especially where there is a chance of romantic involvement, remember this simple fact: a person either belongs to God or to the devil. There is no middle ground.

To have sex with a non-Christian is to defile Christ. Scripture is emphatic that sex makes two people one. A born-again Christian is spiritually united to Christ and a non-Christian is spiritually united to the devil. To marry a non-Christian is therefore to try to make Christ one with the devil.

2Corinthians 6:14-18
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people.” “Therefore come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.” “I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”

1Corinthians 6:15-20
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” But he who unites himself with the Lord is one with him in spirit. Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

A spiritually mixed marriage is a hideous perversion. It is the profanity of trying to unite that which must never be united – trying to unite that which belongs to the Holy One to that which belongs to the Evil One; trying to make holiness ( what we are through our union with Jesus ), one with evil ( the basic nature of the non-Christian. )

Whoever is born of God becomes a new creation.

2Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

Someone commented that those who have been born again are virtually a new species. There is a lot of truth in that thought, and this puts sexual union with a non-Christian out of the question.

2Corinthians 6:14
Did Paul have in mind an Old Testament law.

Deuteronomy 22:10
Do not plow with an ox and a donkey yoked together.

Joining side by side two different species of different height and gait, and making them pull together, would be an act of cruelty. Interestingly, in Old Testament thinking, an ox is a clean animal ( able to be used in the service of God ) and a donkey is unclean.

In the back of Paul’s mind might also have been another Scripture:

Leviticus 19:19
---“Do not mate different kinds of animals.---

People who become Christians after they are married have God’s blessing because they did not deliberately enter a spiritually perverse marriage. They were both non-Christians when they married.

But Christians who sin by marrying non-Christians are in grave danger. By disregarding God’s warning about relationships, they throw away their right to divine protection, unless they thoroughly repent, which involves genuinely regretting that they married. Never imagine you can fool God by deciding beforehand to ‘enjoy’ both sin and God’s forgiveness by ‘repenting’ after your deliberate sin.

This is something that needs to be thought about very seriously before a Christian marries a non-Christian.

TGIF